I’ve only been a mom for 10 months, but somehow, here I was in line with all the other Kindergarten parents getting ready to send my little baby into the great abyss that is school. My husband dropped our son off at the preschool building, before joining me for the “final farewell.” I was in a daze as I worried about whether she was ready for Kindergarten. Would she be academically ready? Would she excel or fall behind? Will she make new friends or will the other students make fun of her? Will her teacher take care of her and watch out for her? Will she remember to ask to go potty and will she know how to open all the containers in her lunch? Will she even eat her lunch? Man, how do you moms do it? All I’ve done for weeks is worry!
The worrying didn’t stop with how she’d be at school – it continued onto apparel choices. Flashback a few days ago – there we were, the day before school started, returning from a weekend camping trip, which I’m sure is against the parent rules for “things you’re not supposed to do the day before school starts,” but at least we were home by 6pm. However on our was home I started to panic (I know it’s a recurring theme), I realized I didn’t buy them some brand new perfectly matched outfit for their first day school. Growing up, it was a tradition, in my house, to stand by the front door or on the staircase and take a picture on the first day of school. Now it was my turn to start that tradition, was I blowing it by not having them wear a new outfit? And school shoes, (don’t get me started), I went to Payless, but nothing fit them because they’re in between sizes. Again, growing up, I always had a new pair of shoes for the first day of school, but I can’t in good conscience, buy them shoes that will either only fit them until next week, or will fall off until they grow again next week. So again, I’m feeling like I let them down.
I went to sleep thinking, where do I drop her off in the morning? I suppose I take her to her classroom but I have to drop my son at the same time, how do I do that?…. The worrying had gotten out of control. I even worried she would sense the worrying and start it herself (a trait I refuse to pass onto her) and so I took a deep breathe, and decided to let the worrying go.
What happened the next morning was a gift! It was probably about 6:20am and I had to go out to the garage to get something. As I walked out of the door I was taken aback by the view that you see from the picture at the top of this post. The sun was just rising and the sunbeams were reaching across the sky. I felt the Lord’s presence as He used His creation to remind me of His control over everything. How could I worry about clothing when the Lord was making the sunrise? I took another deep breath, called my daughter outside and shared the morning sunrise with her. Now that’s a way to start Kindergarten!
After school she came home and told me about how they learned the letter A. She told me that she had asked the teacher to go to the bathroom. She even got to go with another girl in her class. So yes, she asked to go potty and she even made a friend. What I didn’t hear was about how somebody noticed she was wearing last season’s Dora tennis shoe. I didn’t hear about anyone making fun of her and she even ate all her lunch! Her teacher even said she’s right on top of things. And so, as I breathe a sign of relief, I am reminded of Padre Pio’s famous quote – “Pray, Hope and Don’t Worry.” Perhaps my previously mentioned “worrying” needs a little adapting, but I plan on making that my resolution for this school year. My children have dreams and aspirations for what’s ahead of them this year and what they’ll achieve. I am going to worry less and trust more.
What’s your spiritual resolution for the upcoming school year?
Copyright 2012 Courtney Vallejo